Butt plugs, Dildos, Anal beads, Vibrators…

If we can fit it in our arse and it’s not another guy’s cock: then it’s probably a sex toy.

Why We Do It

Toys are always hard, and will never let you down. They’re not only a source of intense physical pleasure for bottoms, but they can also result in us buzzing off the achievement of conquering a huge one. Some are created to mirror a cock, others are bigger than any cock could be, and shaped in a completely different way to provide a different sensation.

Toys can add to the experience of fucking if you’re the top as you wield a toy in your mate’s arse and watching him take it (whether the toy is a mountain or a molehill). Bottoms can use toys to practice relaxing or stretching their hole, and it’s often much easier to orgasm with a vibe massaging your prostate than a dick when you’re being fucked. With group fucking, sharing toys between two bottoms or using double-ended dildos can take us to places cock-and-arse fucking cannot.

The Nuts and Bolts of It

For beginners to arse play you can start small, while more experienced bottoms can jump on toys as wide as they are long. Some of us use toys as a way to practice relaxing the muscles in our arse; this can be useful for guys who are new to heavier arseplay like fisting.

Here’s a few tips and pointers to remember when using toys that can add to the experience and keep you and your partners safe (and grunting like a pig). Once you are across this, you will be the master of your arse.

The G-Spot

Hitting the G-spot, with a cock, finger, or sex toy is an amazing feeling. The technical name for a guy’s g-spot is the ‘prostate’ and the good news is, that finding it is pretty easy;  it’s just at the beginning of the rectum, a few inches inside, just point towards your dick and it’s the firm patch the size of a walnut.

Toys are a great way to practice hitting the spot. If you’re alone, a toy can be great to get you off and if you’re with someone, toy play can liven up sex– double penetration with a vibrator is hot for both of you- just remember to moan when he finds it. Once you find your G-spot, enjoy the orgasms that follow.


Before putting anything in your arse, you should always lube up! Using lube can help minimize the risk of cuts, abrasions, and tears during sex (which can lead to a greater chance of a HIV/STI infection).

There are many different sorts of lubes you can use and for different situations. Silicone and oil-based lubes lasts longer than water based but can eat away at your toys. Make sure you’re using the right one by following this rule of thumb:

  • Water-based lube – safe with almost all products
  • Silicone based lube – not safe for silicone gloves/toys/condoms
  • Oil based lube – not safe for latex gloves/toys/condoms

Going Deeper

If you are a well-trained bottom, and can take a big dildo or two, or would like to practice taking a large dildo, vibrator or butt plug then remember these few points:

Start with something you can take and work up to bigger sized toys. You can train your arse; you don’t need to push it straight away.

Use plenty of lube. The more you use the easier it will go in.

Go slowly, allow your arse to get used to what you are putting in there.

You will have an easier time taking the dildo if the muscles in your arse aren’t tensed up. If you push it in when it is tensed, you could do some damage (not to mention the pain). Remember: deep breaths = deep dildos and deep play.

Cleaning toys

When you are done playing with your toys, be sure to clean them. The simplest way to clean toys is with warm soapy water, and leaving them to air dry. You can also use medical-grade sanitisers and surface cleaners if you wish (Viraclean is always a good option). Cleaning toys is vital to reducing the risk of passing on blood-borne viruses like Hep C, which can survive outside the body much longer than HIV (which won’t survive more than a minute or so).


If bleeding occurs, note the colour; if the blood is pink, just monitor it and take it easy. If it is deep red, you should stop. Be sure to keep an eye on the bleeding. If it doesn’t stop, a trip to the doctor may be in order.

Think About

While playing with toys can be a lot of fun, there is a risk of passing on or picking up HIV and other STIs. Hepatitis C is a particular risk for guys playing with bigger toys.

The good news is there are really easy ways to reduce the risk of picking up or passing on HIV and STIs when using toys:

Sharing toys the right way

Sharing toys with your fuck partners might be hot, but it does carry a risk passing on STI’s and potentially HIV. If you can, have your own toys handy. If you do share, then using a condom (and then changing it each time) can help prevent passing anything on (don’t forget: oil-based lube is bad for condoms). If you don’t use condoms, then cleaning each time is recommended (warm soapy water can do the trick and having a bowl of it next to your play space is easy enough).

Avoid sharing pots of lube

If you are using a pot of lube with your toys, it also may be an idea to have one pot for each person or use a pump action lube instead. Tiny specks of blood can get into a pot, and if that blood has Hep C or HIV then there is a risk that this can be passed on to others.