Fisting

Fisting is the art of fucking a guy’s arse with your hand and even sometimes forearm.

Why We Do It

For those of us into it, fisting can be the ultimate sexual experience. Putting yourself completely in the hands of a top can take you to a place of pure ecstasy and filth. Whether the bottom loves having his arse stretched, filled, of the feeling of complete penetration, fisting can give you powerful orgasms and a deep connection with your partner that’s difficult to match. For the top, the power exchange can be intense as you are given total control over your partner with their complete trust in you.

Part of what makes fisting hot is the journey in getting there. For the uninitiated: you’re not punching a hole in the wall. Fisting starts with a few fingers, then the whole hand and once past the knuckles you can make a fist.

For guys who are experienced bottoms, taking a fist to the wrist, then part of the forearm and all the way to the elbow is not uncommon.  It requires constant negotiation and builds a deep connection with your partner.

The Nuts and Bolts of It

While fisting may be filthy and very hot, it also involves a lot of trust and communication. For guys who are first-timers or don’t have much experience fisting, it’s always a great idea to partner up with an experienced top. You want to take it slow and be confident in what you’re doing (or what’s being done to you):

For Tops

Cut and file your nails until every finger is as smooth as possible. You don’t want any sharp edges, as you’re about to be in some very delicate places.

Remove jewelry if you wear it (even if your watch is plastic or waterproof!)

Check your hands for cuts or sores- using lemon juice is a great way to tell if you have any broken skin.

Respect you partner. Listen when they ask you to go slower, or ask you to stop.

Don’t push too hard. The bottom’s arse need to feel pleasure not pain.

For Bottoms 

Shit happens. To reduce the chance of it happening while you’re being fisted, many bottom guys try not to eat for a few hours before, especially if you’re planning on a long session or going deep. Fibre supplements, like psyllium husk/Metamucil, taken in the days leading up to the session can help with this. Then douche early, go for a run, do some stretches, and douche again until you’re as confident as you can be that you’re ready for some serious anal play.

If you really want it, then you should be able to take it. This goes for everything from cocks to butt plugs, to dildos to fists, and even baseball bats. It’s not uncommon for guys to use chems to help relax; be mindful that this can make pain, as well as decisions about going too far, more difficult to judge.

Stretch your hole. You may want to start with a cock or toys (if it’s toys, work your way up from average to large). The more practice you get relaxing to take big toys, the easier it will be to relax when you want to take a fist.

For both guys

Lube up! Be sure that you have plenty of good lube for fisting on hand. Not only will a lot of lube make fisting easier, it reduces the risk of any potential harm to the bottom guy’s arse.

Discuss whether or not you will use gloves. Understand that there may be risks of STIs if gloves aren’t used.

First lesson: Patience is a virtue.  Despite the name, fisting isn’t about forcing a fist into someone’s arse- that’s punch fucking. Fisting is gently working your fingers into his hole, and then making a fist once you’re inside. Really take the time to open up your bottom’s arse, or let yourself open up over time. Rimming, fingering, and fucking are good starters, and then move on to plugs and dildos that the bottom guy feels confident in using.

Be aware that when a guy takes a fist for the first time the response can be intense. Some guys may spontaneously cum as soon as the fist slips in, or have full body orgasms over time. Whatever the response, allow the bottom to experience all the sensations without forcing your fist into him.

Depending on how the bottom feels, he may want to stop after this. As taking a fist is a new sensation and can be intense the first time, the bottom may tell you to fist him for short periods then stop, or he may just say: “Don’t stop!” As a top, the key is to listen and be aware of his reactions and respond in a considerate and mindful manner.

If you get off on the power you wield, remember: with great power cums great responsibility!

Think About

There are some risks associated with fisting and it’s important to know them before you start:

Gloves

Gloves are a great barrier protection when fisting. Replace them if you’re fisting another person or touch anything other than the arse or the lube (such as the sling chains, bed or floor). Some tips for wearing gloves:

Pre-powdered gloves can irritate the arse and its sensitive lining.

Latex gloves are weakened by oil based lubes like Crisco- try vinyl or nitrile.

Pushing Limits

The further inside the arse you go, the more chance there is of doing damage. Just inside the anus is the rectum (which is conveniently about the size of a fist), past that is the colon where there are little-to-no pain receptors and the lining is very fragile making it more likely to tear without you noticing (especially if you’re drunk/high). Best practice is to relax, go slow, and with a technique that’s responsive to what feels good for both you and your buddy.

Lube

Use plenty of it and don’t share it. A lot of guys use pump action bottles because it’s easy for specks of blood to get into a pot, and if that blood has Hep C or HIV then there is a risk that this can be passed on to others.

Popular lubes for fisting are J-Lube (water-based) and Crisco (oil-based) because they last longer and that means you can play longer.

  • Water-based lube – safe with almost all products
  • Silicone based lube – not safe for silicone gloves/toys/condoms
  • Oil based lube – not safe for latex gloves/toys/condoms

Drugs

Many guys use alcohol or other drugs before fisting because they can help to relax you and lower your inhibitions. However, taking drugs is one of the biggest reasons for fisting going wrong; they can make you less likely to notice pain, or push yourself further than you would naturally go. Consider how much you’ve taken, don’t be too rough or go too fast, and be mindful of bleeding.

Bleeding

It’s very common to bleed while fisting. If it’s a small amount (turns the lube pink) it’s probably nothing more serious than a small tear or fissure. Alert the bottom, and check how they feel. If the blood is bright or deep red, stop immediately and seek medical help.

Reducing Risk

HIV, Hep C and STI’s

The likelihood of bleeding when fisting is very high, so wearing gloves and using plenty of lube is important as Hepatitis C and even HIV can be transmitted through tiny cuts or grazes on your hands.

HIV dies very quickly after leaving the body, but Hepatitis C and other infections like Syphilis, Gonorrhoea and LGV survive longer and can be easily transmitted on gloves, toys and shared lube. So, it’s important that each person being fisted uses their own pot of lube, and toys are washed or fresh condoms applied to them before being shared.